[Note:- The purpose of this brief biopic is to present a brief timeline in case the writer's assumptions cause confusion.]

bill's childhood was typically middle-class conforming towards success in education. But within this was his relationships with his parents in which he loved his mother gaining spirituality from her, and learning much from his father's repression. For most of his life bill criticised his upbringing of conditioning and conformity and hid behind that. But once zandtao crossed the threshold he understood what was meant to be in his upbringing. zandtao still loved his mother but is now very grateful to his father - thankful for the totality of his Sacred Wound.

Out from his upbringing bill's shyness was crippling but thankfully it was for such a short time because at 23 he had an upheaval - connecting to the path - path emerging. The events of the upheaval were that he was an ongoing drunk and had lost control of his life. Through his own stupidity in mid-December he caused a sacking - well-deserved, went back to his parents for an extended Xmas - not understanding at the time that what was happening was as a consequence of his upbringing. Somehow he managed to understand that he had to return to London, and in early January returned to find any kind of job and be disciplined in doing that job; this he managed.

That was a description of the events but what was happening was a deep spiritual change - a partial awakening. Because of his Sacred Wound bill had little self-esteem and was not invested in his conditioning nor his conformity - no work discipline or career motivation. He went through the motions of the career process after uni without any personal commitment, and lacking discipline he was lucky to keep employment as long as he did. His upheaval was the path emerging - firstgrace.

After returning to London bill went through a significant-but-incomplete deconditioning process. For the first time he experienced jhanas, meditational experiences that came with writing; bill started writing, mainly science-fiction. He was fortunate to connect with an Arts Centre in the Elephant and Castle where his meditation experiences, writing and spiritual development were validated. Upheaval had brought out creativity.

But upheaval had also brought compassion, and he had started work as a temporary houseparent in a care home. At that time it was the spiritual development that was a priority, and with the help of Arts people he was given a chance to stay in a Belgian cottage. This was grounding, and he began to build on his writing and learning-through-writing. At the end of that Summer he returned to the UK taking a full-time post as a houseparent. The Arts Centre had closed, and his contact with Arts people started to fade. The next Summer he decided to travel with some vague idea of earning a living whilst travelling and becoming a writer. This broke down quickly as he lost his money - or it was stolen; either way he returned to the UK, and started studying for a PGCE. That was the end of the upheaval.

His compassion led to teacher-dedication. When he started he had personal scepticism about the education institution, yet forewarned did not help and his dedication driven by spirituality was soon worn down. At the same time his clinging had become addiction to alcohol again, that lasted another 10 years. During that time and until he retired bill experienced romantic love and life. Upheaval had woken love in him and he sought the cosmic of romantic love. To begin with he was coping with alcohol, and then just work pressure. At 40 life took him to international teaching and travel, first in Southern Africa, then Middle East, China and back to Nigeria; he then retired early to Thailand two years after his parents had naturally died. His teaching life he called his 2nd childhood. Always he had some connection to the path, but at the same time he built up an egoic self-esteem through work - different conditioning and conformity.

Throughout his 2nd childhood there was still writing and there developed back-to-nature during the Summer breaks. These were his times of centring in solitude; sometimes writing zifi in Lidors and Kirramura, and sometimes walking.

Then he retired early at 54. It was getting harder and harder to return to teaching after the Summer breaks, and when bill's parents died he had sufficient money to retire to live cheaply in Thailand. On the one hand he was sick of the careerism and profiteering in teaching, and following a mid-life review in Botswana he had become Buddhist. In Botswana he had studied for an M Ed. The course helped him reflect and he took that further reflecting on his life - nt just education. The Xmas after he left Botswana he travelled in Thailand and became Buddhist. Contract breaks in the UK then connected him to Harnham Buddhist monastery where he consolidated this phase of Buddhism until he retired early.

Once he retired his writing and studies took off - mainly revolving around Buddhist development through writing. At this time he began seeing himself in terms of roles. He had grown up as bill and continued to meet people as bill, from retirement spiritually he developed as zandtao, taking on the role of zandtaomed - meditation adviser, Wai Zandtao as zifi writer, and Matriellez for education. What at the time he saw as studying Buddhism was in fact developing his practice, and this was mainly learnt through Ajaan Buddhadasa. There was a need for focus and because he became Buddhist in Thailand he focussed on Theravada, then focussing on Buddhadasa and finally just focussing on MwB - anapanasati bhavana.

Whilst he focussed on MwB he studied others. After 15 years his practice had developed sufficient atammayata for bill to cross the threshold of autonomy, yet he had been studying other teachers Thich Nhat Hanh in Buddhism, Teal Swan and Eckhart Tolle amongst others in wider spirituality. With autonomy zandtao saw there were diverse ways for path, and that his developed MwB was just his practice. Whilst others might see zandtao as Buddhist, he sees himself as autonomous with no religion but with an MwB practice.

Following autonomy he worked on a love-wisdom balance with Nicola Amadora and Teal Swan - biassed because of a wisdom institution. Then he started looking at secular Buddhism and a secular path? leading to the realisation that there is no religion even though religions can provide practice. Studying Gabi Kovalenko led to The Zeer developing consciousness from awareness to the purpose of consciously loving and evolving consciousness. And then developing - pathtivism.

All of his spirituality occurred while he was retired in Thailand where he expects to die.